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14 March 2008 @ 04:20 am
And so it goes.  
So, I finished the book I started for NaNoWriMo on February 25th (Well, technically the 26th). It finished up at just over 101K. The last 9K were written the Monday after the February NaNo meeting. Since then, I've organized notes for another book, this one the first of a series, and poured over short stories in an attempt to understand the medium. (Genesis is excellent at them, but I just can't grasp the concept.) And what have a written?
I'd like to say not a damn thing, because that's emphatic, but in truth I have managed my requisite five minutes every day. Rarely related, but all of it sensible.
The book I wrote for Nano, whose working title is The Arthur House, is set in a completely new story world made up for the express purpose of writing a book for Nano 2007. Why? Because I thought i needed a refreshing aside. And I finished the book! In four months. An amazing achievement considering I've been trying to write novels for years and haven't actually written a beginning, middle, and end for any one of them. It's supposed to have made me feel confident, like I achieved something. Like I had accomplished.
And it did. For a bit. But now I stare at the blinking cursor for my next piece and find myself wondering if I was only able to complete it because it didn't matter. Because it wasn't one of my epics, and wasn't set in one of the vastly detailed worlds I so dearly wish to share in written words.
I'm not angsting full on about it just yet, but it's around the bend. For now I'm keeping back the negative tide with the knowledge that Genesis has written some of the best stuff I've ever read, and yet she laments from time to time that it might be crap anyway. If she can be riddled with self-doubt and still turn out those beautiful things, maybe so can I.

Also, I beat Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne at the beginning of the month. I ended up with the "Neutral" ending, and found this satisfactory. In the future, I intend to play through again to fill my Demonic Compendium and complete the Labyrinth of Amala for the True Demon ending, but for now I am happy to be done. I finished the game with some awesome demons. Like Samael, the red 10-winged serpent. And Vile Girimehkala, Wargod Ganesha, Lady Skadi, Lady Pavarti, Entity Albion, Avatar Barong (I want one as a pet), Wilder Hresvelgr (Ice Birdie!), Avian Garuda, Lady Kali, Seraph Uriel, and the Snake Yurlungur (the magic immune serpent). I was a little sad that I never got high enough to have a Night Lilith, because she was hot. Lady Skadi and Seraph Uriel only ended up there because my Megami Scathach and Divine Throne evolved just before I went to Kagatsuchi. Little more than a level and stat boost for them. I ended the game titled "Spirit," which I really wish I knew what meant...
So now, I've just got Final Fantasy 8 and Suikoden to finish. And Pikmin 2, but I'm not sure that counts. And Final Fantasy X-2, but I'm playing that with Genesis, so no rush. Oh! And Rule of Rose. Heh. I was so eager for that one, then I played it twice and got distracted with FFXII. Of course, all of this is usually distracted by Rock Band, where I'm trying to work up to the Expert vocal level in preparation for rocking out with DL, who is reputedly up to Expert guitar work. Current goal on RB? To bring "I'm So Sick" down out of my nose and into a non-earsplitting octave.

And there we have my ranting. Oddly enough, I started this entry to bitch about the ills of being a fall-back friend, but know what? It just isn't important. I have just enough fabulous people for whom I am a full-time friend, so I'm not going to rail about it.